


beyond words

by listeninginblue



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Boyfriends, Domestic Fluff, Happy Chansoo Day, M/M, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, With each other, being in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:48:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24684088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/listeninginblue/pseuds/listeninginblue
Summary: They kissed again, slowly, languidly, pouring out emotions they couldn’t say pass through their lips because if it’s about describing what they feel with each other--it just come beyond words.
Relationships: Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Park Chanyeol
Comments: 8
Kudos: 53





	beyond words

**Author's Note:**

> Happy chansoo day!! please enjoy this short fic with too much adjectives and the word 'always'. i tried my best and pulled the most constructive english grammar i have so please bear with it if you can. unbeta-ed and warning: word vomit!

  
  
  
  


”I feel so bad for Chanyeol-oppa…”  
  
Kyungsoo boarded the KTX seconds before the 10:30 pm scheduled time of his ticket. There were only a smaller group of people who board the train at this time of night and most of them were tired office workers, students, and estranged individuals who preferred to keep the solemn silence they were gifted after an exhausting day. It was one of the reasons he decided to take the third to the last train schedule to lessen the chance of him being seen out in public.  
  
Somehow, taking his military break relieved his body from the grueling work of cooking in the military-based kitchen for hundreds of soldiers everyday. The pads of his hands carried months of scars from holding hot pans and steel stirrers, rough like the texture of the coarse part of a sponge. He could feel the mold of the steel curved on his hands but Kyungsoo felt nothing short of pride that he could serve his country with his hard work.  
  
He pulled down his chin to let the top cover of his cap obscure his eyes as he passed by two female students who most likely studied their time in the library. He sat a meter from them while other passengers took their seat. The entrance of the train closed after a few minutes of waiting and the lulling sound of the vehicle moving comforted him.  
  
”Chanyeol-oppa deserves someone better,” the two female students discreetly murmured as to respect the other people in the train but as Kyungsoo was only a few spaces away from them, he could hear the flow of their conversation. He chanced a side glance and saw the EXO merchandise displayed on their handbags. Kyungsoo silently steered his eyes on his lap and clasped his hands, making himself look shorter and out of sight. “I mean, Chanyeol-oppa and Kyungsoo-oppa being together sounds ridiculous right? Kyungsoo-oppa does not show his support and love like how Chanyeol-oppa does. It makes me feel like Chanyeol-oppa is the only one who gives in their relationship and Kyungsoo-oppa just takes.”  
  
He fought off the flinch his body responded to the hurtful accusation he heard, however, he allowed the painful string of words to choke his heart and pulled it halfway through his throat. He clasped his hands tighter.  
  
”It doesn’t make any sense. Why did Chanyeol-oppa fall in love with someone who doesn’t show how much he loves him like he does? I pity him sometimes whenever he supports Kyungsoo-oppa and his projects but when it was his turn, his so-called soulmate wouldn’t even take the time to support him.”  
  
”I know! Argh, if it were me, I would be loud like Chanyeol-oppa so that he would feel the love I have for him!”  
  
”Every time Chanyeol-oppa compliments him, he only received blows and hits. I don’t think they have a healthy relationship. When I will get a boyfriend, I will make sure to treat him right. I don’t want to be seen like Kyungsoo-oppa.”  
  
Kyungsoo bit his lips, his jaw clenched and his chest felt so constricting yet he couldn’t do anything about it but hugged his tensed body to will the pain away. His eyes moistened with emotions he knew he pulled from the bottom of his insecurities, of the shelves sitting heavily on his mind he sometimes entertained to feed the thoughts that he wasn’t good enough for Chanyeol who always knew how make him feel loved. He closed his eyes.  
  
If people think like these…wouldn’t Chanyeol also think of these things too?  
  
Wouldn’t Chanyeol hoped for someone better too?  
  
Chaos erupted on his mind, a battle he always loses more than he wins. The train steadily ceased on its first stop, dropping the people on the specified destination. He opened his eyes in time to see the two female students walked out of the train, their conversation about the things they needed to study.  
  
The train closed its entrance and whirred, moving away from the station. Kyungsoo took little breaths of air from his nose, trying to relax the tenseness of his body just like how he always and quietly does to not attract any attention to him. Once he could move his hands, he fetched his phone on his pocket and swiped it open. He thumbed the message app and opened the first text.  
  
  
  
  
****Chanyeol****  
  
_I’ll wait for you xx_  
  
seen 6:00 AM  
  
  
  
  
His fingers itched to tell Chanyeol he couldn’t go. Maybe, come up with excuses for all the days of his military break just so he could tell Chanyeol he couldn’t go and see him because-- _he is_ \--because of _\--he couldn’t._ _  
__  
_ Kyungsoo closed his phone and hid it before he could do something he would regret.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_  
_ 11:31 PM  
  
The clock on his phone glared at him. He was standing for six minutes straight in front of Chanyeol’s apartment. He knew the pass code but he wasn’t sure of himself if he could face his beloved without being read bare of all the thorns he collected on his way here. He doesn’t want Chanyeol, who probably slaved his way again inside his studio, to worry about him. He took a shaky breath, hoping it expelled everything he doesn’t want Chanyeol to notice before he unlocked the apartment by touching the code.  
  
”Why did you just stood there for several minutes, Soo?” A deep, cheeky voice greeted him as Kyungsoo stepped inside the apartment, surprising him a little. Chanyeol was leaning on the wall with his right shoulder, softly smiling at him with those eyes who could use some hours of sleep and mussed up blonde hair unveiled by his trusted head wears. Chanyeol could look so sleepy but still radiate such brightness that could rival the sun.  
  
Kyungsoo looked at him and didn’t waste anymore seconds to embrace his lovely giant, snuggling deep on his chest when he felt the taller encaging him with his own embrace. Kyungsoo didn’t know why but when he saw Chanyeol, the feelings of insecurity suddenly vanished. He didn’t know why but being with Chanyeol, seeing him, touching him, hearing him talk--impacted him more than he expected. He missed him so much and he didn’t ever stop to think how much. Because it’s just painful to be separated for so long from the one who always feel like home.  
  
He caressed Chanyeol’s backside, drinking the way Chanyeol’s soft laughs reverberated on his body. He drew a breath before shortly releasing him from his hold to pull his face mask down, before firmly kissing Chanyeol’s grin. His boyfriend responded passionately back at him as they embraced each other again. As if the longing they felt from the start of their separation could be satiated with the ardent twirl of their lips, dancing and touching with each other, remembering how they taste.  
  
They kissed each other until they needed air. They held each other like they would fall down if they don’t. Simple ‘I love you’s’ through words, written or verbal, don’t work that much for them anymore. While they rest their foreheads on each other, Kyungsoo gently smooched Chanyeol’s lips one last time before letting his arms loosely hang on his body.  
  
”Did you ate already?”  
  
”I did.”  
  
”Okay, let’s get you to bed.”  
  
The two of them walk to the bedroom with their fingers intertwined. A comfortable silence accompanied them as they move around the room. Kyungsoo softly squeezed Chanyeol’s hand before releasing it to wear off his cap and face mask. He placed them on the nightstand and went over to the closet to change his clothes while Chanyeol laid down on his bed with his phone. Out of all his organized clothes he left, Kyungsoo chose a long black shirt from the muddled set of clothes he saw inside the right side of the closet. He changed on the spot, feeling the remaining tingles of Chanyeol’s lips on his as he heard the taller snorting, presumably texting with Sehun.  
  
He folded his used clothes and set them aside for tomorrow before turning back and clicking his tongue when he saw Chanyeol’s bare feet. “Chanyeol, why aren’t you wearing any socks? You know you often get cold feet at night.” Kyungsoo searched through the closet for socks and casually put them on his boyfriend’s feet.  
  
”Ahh, it just add to the laundry I needed to do and I forgot to do a week’s worth--” Chanyeol clamped his mouth closed, smiling sheepishly when he put down his phone to meet Kyungsoo’s unimpressed face. The smaller one just sighed and climbed on the bed to lay down with him. He gathered Chanyeol’s body to his chest as the taller wrapped his long arms around his hips. They snuggled tightly on the bed, eradicating every inches of space they find. It felt nice sharing warmth and being held secure with someone you longed for.  
  
Suddenly, one of Chanyeol’s hand crawled downward until it reached his butt, palming it appreciatively. “It’s still fat, I see.”  
  
Kyungsoo pinched the pointy end of Chanyeol’s cute big ears, hearing his boyfriend whine before gently stroking his blonde strands. He ran his palm on his head and tugged gently, the way Chanyeol like it.  
  
”I’ll do the laundry tomorrow,” he said. His boyfriend cuddled him deeply.  
  
”Noooo,” Chanyeol fitted his head underneath Kyungsoo’s chin. The smaller one could feel his distinct pout on his collarbone. “Tomorrow is the only day I’ll have you for myself, so keep off your hands from dirty laundry and instead, keep it wrapped around me.”  
  
Before Kyungsoo could open his mouth, his boyfriend playfully shushed him and told him he already scheduled a laundry service. Kyungsoo could do nothing about it but remind the taller about taking care not only himself, but also his everyday responsibilities.  
  
”Are you eating three times a day?” Chanyeol confidently hummed in response. Kyungsoo thought he emphasized it enough for him that his health always come first.  
  
”Are you taking a bath everyday?” Chanyeol grumbled in a way kids do when asked about something they don’t want to entertain and Kyungsoo laughed. He told him to at least shower once a day to freshen himself and relax his body.  
  
”Are you sleeping enough hours everyday?” With this, Chanyeol didn’t let out any response to satisfy his question. Kyungsoo tutted, still stroking the his head. He knew about Chanyeol’s upcoming works and that his boyfriend specifically made this night and the day tomorrow work-free to spend time with him. Of course there were times before his enlistment that Chanyeol would camped in his studio for 24/7 _quite literally_ but Kyungsoo was there to take care of him and remind him of his health.  
  
Kyungsoo is so proud of his beloved. Now that he’s doing things he mentioned so passionately about, the things he always wanted to do being laid on the surface for him to take. The lanky boy who would talk his ears for hours about his dreams, currently holds the reigns of his “ _I hope’s_ ” that came from his hard labor. Chanyeol is amazing but can also be self-destructive along the way.  
  
Silence found them again but he knew without telling that his boyfriend got the message that he need to take care of himself properly, so he didn’t give him a good scolding any longer. Chanyeol knew how to listen to him, without the usage of words after all. He kissed his blonde-colored hair approvingly. “Why did you color your hair blonde again, yeol?”  
  
Chanyeol slightly tilted his head to look at him cheekily. “Do I look handsome?”  
  
”You know the answer without asking me.”  
  
”I know, but I want to fish out the compliments I can get from you. You know your words matter most, love,” Chanyeol looked at him expectantly. Kyungsoo felt a pang of guilt rose on his chest, remembering the stinging words from earlier. He let out a small breath.  
  
Kyungsoo held Chanyeol’s gaze. “Then, Chanyeol you are one of the most gorgeous people I have ever met--”  
  
”One of the most huh…guess you met good looking soldiers in the military, soo.”  
  
”--and the most talented. Chanyeol you are a brilliant musician and artist. You are passionate and dedicated that you can do almost anything you set your mind into. You try to learn things and you excel on them every time. I am so proud of you for successfully making your own studio and creating music with people you trust. You also wear your heart on your sleeves that is why people feels drawn to you. You didn’t even know them that much, but you always give so much love that people can feel it just by looking at you. People even said that the entirety of your 6ft height accommodated the space your large heart occupies and I agree. Chanyeol you are amazing. Everything you do, you do it with love, and it’s one of the many, many things I love about you.”  
  
Kyungsoo saw a glint in Chanyeol’s eyes, mouth agape. His boyfriend let go of him a little, propping himself up with his elbow. His eyes were serious. “Kyungsoo, did someone told you something you shouldn’t have heard?”  
  
It was Kyungsoo’s turn to be silent. He mulled over his thoughts before saying, “It doesn’t matter.”  
  
”It does! Whatever they said soo, it isn’t true,” Chanyeol sat back up to cup Kyungsoo’s face in his hands, tracing his cheeks with his thumb with gentle caress. “They are not me, Kyungsoo. They don’t know what do _I_ really feel. Trust me when I said you are enough just by being you. I love you for who you are.” Whenever Chanyeol tell him those exact words, he always, always sound so sure that Kyungsoo felt almost stupid for thinking otherwise. Chanyeol didn’t have to assure him. Chanyeol didn’t have to know him so well even with his most expressionless face on. Chanyeol didn’t have to constantly tell him he loved him but he did.  
  
Chanyeol always see something in him, more within, something that is inherently Doh Kyungsoo, that no one could ever see past his masked self, that even he, himself, doesn’t know but Chanyeol does.  
  
  
Chanyeol I don’t deserve you.  
  
But,  
  
_I love you.  
__  
__  
_ Chanyeol brightly smiled at him. He must have unknowingly uttered it aloud. They kissed again, slowly, languidly, pouring out emotions they couldn’t say pass through their lips because if it’s about describing what they feel with each other--it just come _beyond words_.  
  
So they tried to show it in different ways, especially in public. Normal ways that people might found too normal, too small to mean something special. Chanyeol may loudly proclaim his love for him but he played his words with jokes. Kyungsoo may hit Chanyeol for being mischievous but he tried to carefully knead the spot that hurts. They held hands in public for seconds to quenched the need to hold each other longer. They shoot a blinding smile toward each other as a sign that they are grateful to see each other under the same ceiling.  
  
In private, everything just happen normally. Eating with each other, watching movies, playing sports, creating music, singing, cooking--they all feel normal and yet, they mean so much more. Doing them together makes all the difference.  
  
They slept soundly within each other’s arms and nothing felt more perfect.  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Kyungsoo kept stroking Chanyeol’s hair, allowing the seconds of time to flow. The early morning sun cast them in a calming glow and bathed their room with striking streaks of pale gold but unobtrusive. He held Chanyeol’s face and kissed it akin to a mother’s kiss to her sleeping babe. He has been admiring his beloved ever since he woke up before the sun invited itself into their room.  
  
Chanyeol may look so daringly handsome in photo shoots, or adorably dorky and fans may chose their respective favorite side of him. But right now, here in Kyungsoo’s arms, he looked more like Kyungsoo’s favorite person.  
  
He thought of the things that Chanyeol would like for breakfast, or for lunch in this matter. Chanyeol needed all the hours of sleep he could have. His phone pinged but Kyungsoo didn’t move to get it. Later, he decided.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
****Sehun****  
  
_Kyungsoo hyung! Take care of Chanyeol hyung today keke come by the studio this afternoon! Chanyeol hyung and I would like you to listen to our compositions x_ _  
__  
_ sent 6:01 AM  
  


**Author's Note:**

> hello!! thank you for reading this! idk much about train schedules and military breaks but this is a fanfic so i tried hehe, happy chansoo day 2020!! (altho it's june 13 rn in my country) c:


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